Memories & Conversations -- 27 March 2008

Well -- it has been an interesting day:

-- the day was not super eventful but the conversations and the gossip as well as the realizations about the past have combined to make the day somewhat eventful -- but in the end what will be the result of this conglomeration of events ???

Well I had a call from ABBY (someone special) and she and I discussed gossip of others and then drama in her life and then finally we said goodnight -- ABBY is in the UK and she is coming to visit in April -- which is quite exciting -- but the conversation tonight -- I felt remiss if I did not ask about her previous relationship and the almost 9 year relationship she was in -- and the response I got was quite interesting and at the same time raised issues inside myself about my past -- and in the end I think I can grow from these feelings -- or at least I hope to -- I know it makes me sound like a broken record but memories are sharper instruments than once thought

Well "Abby" informed me about the conversation -- email -- she had with her significant other on or about the 9th anniversary which was the same day I left for the USA -- oddly enough -- but then she described the issues and how she didnt want to talk to him and in the end just said we need to move on -- I know what that is like and NOW i think i am seeing both sides of the equation -- but in the end the past is still painful from time to time -- not the pain of regret or remorse - or anything especially soul destroying but just memories

So in the end -- i saw that the person with whom I was previously in a long term relationship may be married or at least close to being married -- and at the same time the conversation with "abby" brought back those memories -- in the end it seems like it is just something one lives with as memories -- but in the end -- I do not want the past back and nor do I want what was the past to begin again -- but it still feels weird -- so in the end it is just something to think about

Finally in the end -- I wonder about "Abby" I really like her and I think I may have found someone very, very special -- who knows in the end -- we shall see where this goes -- Abby has many things to work on herself and I have many things to get sorted in my life -- we shall have to see where this all ends up in the wash so to speak -- i think well but I am not putting the cart before the horse -- or at least i will try my best

Myke